Archive Page 2


Dating a monster — literally

I mentioned vampires in my last post and got some letters about it. Apparently, a lot of people are attracted to Dracula or his beautiful, deadly brides. But would you actually want to date him? I thought I’d run down the list of famous monsters to see if they’re boyfriend material.

hy I’d date him: Always well-dressed. Foreign accents turn me on. Love it when guys kiss my neck. Brides could join in on the fun. Would let me do my own thing during the day.

Why I wouldn’t date him: Brides might get jealous. Aversion to wine means I’d always be drinking alone. Turning into a flying rodent is not sexy.

Frankenstein Monster
Why I’d date him: Talk about a hunk! Nice business-casual look in his sport coat. Hates fire, so he’s a non-smoker.

Why I wouldn’t date him: Just got out of a tough relationship with his Bride. Not exactly a gentle hand. Lots of guys have trouble expressing themselves, but this is ridiculous.

Wolf Man
Why I’d date him: Hey, it’s only a problem once a month; now we’re even. Wouldn’t have to persuade him to try doggy-style.

Why I wouldn’t date him: Mange. Fleas and ticks. Aversion to silver means I’d never get any good jewelry.

Why I’d date him: Hello, he’s royalty!

Why I wouldn’t date him: Talk about a May-December romance; he’s 3,000 years old. Don’t want to get cursed every time we have an argument.

Any I left out? Disagree? Let me know!


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Playing the part

I don’t mean on a movie set. I mean in the bedroom.

I’ve certainly had some role-playing experience in my personal sexual adventures. To spice things up, to please my partners, or to indulge my own fantasies, I’ve been a police officer, a cowgirl, a cheerleader, a teacher, a pirate, and even a vampire. I’ll let you guess which were my ideas and which were theirs.

One of the best role-playing efforts I’ve ever heard of comes in a letter from Cindy in Toronto:

“I was with a guy who was really into Star Wars. Don’t laugh, he made a small fortune buying and selling rare Star Wars toys. As you might guess, he had a thing for Princess Leia. After a few months of pleading (which was great in itself), I agreed.

Princess Leia

“I didn’t know what I was getting into! He made me watch all three films, which I hadn’t seen since I was a kid. He taught me all about the Leia character and her adventures before and after the movies (from novels which no one’s read but him). He sat beside me as we shopped online for her slave girl outfit from Return of the Jedi.

“I felt like I was preparing for a movie. He even gave me some basic dialogue suggestions. When the time finally came, he put Stars Wars music on the CD player and came in dressed as Han Solo. He looked pretty good, actually. We said some lines from the movie, improvised the rest, and then had — so he said — the best sex of his life. After that, I only had to snap my fingers and he would answer my every wish!”

Cindy deserves a medal, or maybe an Academy Award, for her work, don’t you think?

Do you have any role-playing stories to share? Post them or write to me at


Don’t ask!

During a long car ride together, my man and I came up with a list of things never to ask a lover. Why? Because the answers, no matter how honest, will never satisfy you.

  1. Is that girl/guy better-looking than I am?
  2. Would you ever hire a prostitute?
  3. Would you cheat if you knew I would never find out?
  4. What exactly happened at your bachelor(ette) party?
  5. How many people have you slept with?
  6. Which one of my friends do you find most attractive?
  7. Have you thought about having surgery to correct _____?
  8. Do you want to meet my ex?
  9. Have you gained weight? (Change that third word to “lost”!)
  10. Am I the best you’ve ever been with?

I’m not saying you shouldn’t be honest with your partner, but certain questions lead only to disappointment or conflict — it’s the questions themselves, and the mistrust they imply, that’s the problem.

Have any ideas of what to add to the list? Post them!


Getting away from it all

Even a swingset can lead to romantic moments!

I’ve got a romantic weekend getaway coming up.

I love to forget my weekday cares, break my routine, and try myself in a new setting — even if it’s only a long car ride away.

And it can be great for romance.

I’ve always said that sex is about all five sense, plus a “sixth sense” of your imagination. Traveling means new sights, new sounds, and new smells. Order the most exotic dishes at the hotel (or resort or lodge) to experience new tastes. As for the sense of touch, that’s up to you and your lover.

Romance isn’t just found on moonlit beaches. You can have a romantic getaway even in the middle of town, especially using that “sixth” sense. Every place has a history; use it to add a little fantasy to your vacation. You can become a Southern Belle while you’re staying in Georgia or a jazzy 1920’s flapper in Chicago. You can play cowboys and cowgirls out West, or Bogey and Bacall in 1940’s L.A.

Or you can get out of the city. Being surrounded by nature brings out something primal in us. Whether deep in the woods or out on the lake, when you look up and see the stars, you understand what captivated the ancient poets. Just being in a park or a desert where cell phones don’t work is luxurious. And out in the wilderness, you can make all the noise you want.

If you’re short on time or money, you can join the latest craze of staycations. Shut down the computer, close the blinds, turn on the answering machine, and just spend time together. You can cook a meal together, watch a romantic movie, or just enjoy a rare daytime romp in the bedroom.

Have you had a romantic vacation recently? Tell me about it.


I believe in…

Facing my fears.

Taking pride in my body.

Thinking beyond gender roles.

Fulfilling my fantasies.

Never settling.

The healing power of chocolate.

Giving in to temptation.

Trying new things.

Bringing joy to others.

Teaching if I know how.

Learning if I don’t.

Not doing things halfway.

Seeing the world.

Finding the beauty in myself and others.

Spending time instead of money.

The most erotic part of the body is the mind.


Have you seen me?

Emmanuelle in Space

I’ve traveled the world, and beyond, in my erotic escapades. Where have I been? Here are just a few places:

  • The sun-drenched beaches of the Mediterranean
  • The classic elegance of Eastern Europe
  • Glamorous Hollywood (of course)
  • Rio de Janeiro
  • Space
  • Bangkok (my first time!)

And soon I’ll be coming right to your home with my new website.

July 2018
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